The amount of clients and people I find that try something new and find it surprising that they have not mastered it after their first attempt is incredible. Self-doubt and self-deprecation starts to settle in which is soon followed by frustration and eventually just giving up. But why is this usually the way when we start something new? Why is it that when we start something with good intention, and we don’t get the instant gratification of achieving that very thing, do we end up in a negative spiral?
Comparing ourselves to the ‘Joneses’
With social media and how our society is now structured, it is all too easy for us to see others achievements instantaneously. This gives the illusion that everything for them is perfect, they have gifted genes or they’re just naturally talented, when in actuality the person has just posted the end result over countless hours of honing their craft.
Generalising here, the viewer of this content then usually starts a two way thought process. “I wish I was able to have that achievement.” Usually pursuing the goal in question. Or they go down the route of “Due to my circumstance, I couldn’t possibly look to do that!” stopping the journey there in its track, giving up before it starts.
If you’re the type to choose the first option, you now come to a whole host of challenges laid before you. These will test you, create self-doubt and push you out your comfort zones. Here is where 95% give up. The journey isn’t how you imagined, the destination isn’t immediate and so the negative spiral begins. We look toward the posts that may have inspired us and resign to the idea that we aren’t enough for the task at hand, sadly reaching for our comfort zones once again.
We as human beings naturally compare to others, it’s in our DNA and comes back to our animalistic tendencies of finding a mate. Only in today’s standards it’s under the guise of success. The downfall of this is if we leave it to an unconscious response (leaving it to emotion), we always will come to the idea that we are not good enough. Which will leave us either striving yet never reaching or just throwing in the towel.
The Journey is far more important
When starting a challenge, like I said before, we don’t know what trials of tribulations lay ahead of us. This leaves us vulnerable and exposed for what’s to come. So when we try and fail, our mind becomes hyper-critical, and in the aid of self-preservation, it’s safer to quit rather than pushing further into the unknown.
The sad thing about this is that we deny ourselves the experience of finding something potentially unique and exciting. You may have a completely different set of challenges that arise than the other person who you have seen achieving what challenge you’re looking at. With that being said, who knows where it may take you. Your journey may get you a better result than the one you looked up to, providing you with a unique story that others may look up to.
Repetition, Repetition, Repetition
However you like it, repetition is the key. Don’t think that after your first few tries you will have it nailed. To get anything, even if you’re naturally talented, you have to hone your craft. Take time to develop it so you can truly achieve something that is unique to you. This doesn’t have to be fitness related, it could be anything in life you wish to achieve. The matter of the fact is, if you don’t put any time into practice, you won’t get the result you desire.
So if you want to lose weight, perform a pull-up, get a heavy deadlift or whatever it is, get practicing and push yourself to do it until that uncomfortable feeling starts becoming comfortable. Who knows where it may lead…